Currently: Tennis 'Ritual In Repeat'

After five months of transitions, I finally feel like I am actually able to slow down and breathe.  This spring and summer has been a whirlwind of graduations, moving home, starting work and getting settled into this thing called 'real life' and to be quite honest, I am actually really content and happy.  Nothing beats starting the next part of your life!  I know that's cheesy but it's true!

On another note, I find myself always excited for new releases by Tennis.  For some reason have always listened to their stuff in the summer so I have associated them in my mind as a very summery, breezy band.  A romantic band too because they are a husband and wife duo!  I still think that they would be a great first date show if fate somehow snags me a coinciding show during the summer with the convenient presence of a total babe.  For now though this album has been great for the last few beautiful days of summer over here in Washington (can I just say this summer has been really extraordinarily gorgeous?)  As with most new releases from bands with previous stuff that I really love, I had to listen to this newest album a few times before my biases disappeared but now it's on repeat as my go-to showering or commuting music. 'I'm Calling' is one of my favorites off the album!

Only eight more days until fall, can you believe it?  I hardly can!

Fleur power

I am still alive!  It's already week 5 out of 10 for Spring Quarter and I have resorted to survival mode which translates into avoiding my emails and drinking way too much breakfast tea (and never finishing my cup!)  At least the weather has been beautiful, today it hit 80 degrees!  The sun is shining and my skin is soaking in all the vitamin D it can!

Top:  H&M// Pants: H&M// Flats: Payless Shoe Source// Lips: Wet n Wild MegaSlicks Balm Stain in Red-Dy or Not

I have always been a little self conscious of showing too much of my skin out and about but lately I have been loving the look of thin straps on bare shoulders!  I decided that this outfit isn't too bad because even though my shoulders are showing the tank itself covers a lot of my chest.  The cut and flower print is flattering and feminine but at the same time I find it also emphasizes my muscles!  I have a very athletic arm build thanks to years of carrying books and bags and all that good stuff but I don't mind!  These pants were also from H&M and I managed to snag them for only $5 off the clearance rack!  They are a nice high-waist cut and are made of this comfortable fabric.  The best part is that they zip up on the side!  The only bad part is that in exchange for the streamlined look there are no pockets except for phony ones on the back.  I paired this look with some nude flats and I felt cute and functional today.  Now if only my brain would follow suit.  I have also been wearing this balm stain everyday so far this week and I really like it!  It is comfortable and stains quite well but for some reason has the tendency to transfer on my teeth!  I have had three people tell me I had lipstick on my teeth this week, phew! 

Two more days until Friday!  The weather is projected to remain beautiful and sunny and I plan to continue to stay alive!

Currently: Claude Debussy Complete Piano Music Vol. 1 and 2

I have always loved Claude Debussy ever since watching All About Lily Chou-Chou which uses a lot of his music.  I am also a huge lover of Clair De Lune even if it is one of his most over represented pieces!  I had discovered Debussy's complete piano works as performed by Werner Haas around the same time as I watched the film but it was left largely alone to collect hypothetical computer dust in my music folder until recently!  I find these days my mind has been very restless and listening to Debussy has been very helpful in letting me mellow out on the commute home or even just at home when I am stressed, sad, wistful, or all three at once!  I also have the habit of needing to listen to music while I do school work and I find that this really helps me get through some of my more dense readings and writing assignments.

I have been loving:

Arabesque No. 1

Reverie

When they say complete piano works they really do mean it!  You are looking at 313 minutes of pure Debussy.  I have a few favorites but I find both collections a must have if you are just starting to explore his work!  You can purchase volume 1 and volume 2 on Amazon!  

Dreaming myself awake

These past weeks have been filled with vivid dreams that wake me up instantly.  Nothing particularly scary about them but still vivid enough to get my brain into overdrive and my heart pounding! Just now I dreamt I was driving on the freeway and I was having so much difficulty controlling the car.  I had unbuckled my seatbelt and was attempting to put it back on while simultaneously steering the car as I approached exits that forked into different directions. I just kept going faster and faster and the only thing I could do was turn the wheel to direct my car down the first coming path.  There were no other cars on the road but I knew there would be and as I swerved my car down a road at a reckless speed I woke up in bed, my heart pounding so terribly and almost painfully.  

I've never been a good driver, both in life and even in dreams! 

'Cause that's not our deal

The weather is really picking up!  I hate to admit it but I am definitely the kind of person whose mood fluctuates with the weather.  I love the sun but only if it's not too hot so that makes me a picky person too!  I don't think I've shown this maxi skirt before but it's one of my favorite pieces in my closet.  I thrifted it a few years back (it was only $8!) and since then I always reach for it on sunny and breezy days.  The cobalt blue in combination with the pleating makes this skirt so beautiful!  

Shirt: Urban Outfitters// Skirt: Thrifted// Belt: Forever21// Rings: Brandy Melville and Forver21// Nails: Finger Paints polish in Titian Tint

My laptop camera will never do this skirt justice!  I typically wear this skirt with flats and I find that the length falls right at my ankles.  I am short so I have a hard time finding maxi skirts that look good on me/won't make me trip down the stairs and die so this one really is a gem in my mind! It's actually a size L but I think the best thing about thrifting is that you don't feel as bound to size categories as you might in normal retail stores.  One happy development in my life has been my renewed interest in nail polish.  A few weeks back Sally's Beauty Supply had a massive buy one get one free sale on their polishes so I added a few new bottles to my growing collection.  Then I visited San Francisco late March and during a side trip to San Jose, discovered a mecca for all or soon to be nail polish junkies.  If you are ever in San Jose I really recommend checking out US Nail Supply!  Salon polishes at almost half the price?  Beware, it's dangerous!

Also dangerous is this iTunes Live Session performance of Our Deal by Best Coast.  It's one of my favorite songs from Best Coast but I like this variation a lot! Bethany Cosentino has the beachiest of beachy voices!  I've been laying in bed listening to this on repeat and it feels almost like summer but probably because the heating in my apartment is being strange and pumping out heat like it is the dead of winter even though we've turned it down to low! I should look into that ASAP before I melt.

Everything is going to be okay

Learning how to accept the way things are just meant to be and dealing with some tough heart aches but all in all I think everything will be okay!  As always I'm an optimist but I am slowly learning how to be a realist too.  All that complicated stuff aside, I am on my last quarter for my undergraduate college years!  I am very excited at the thought of finally graduating in Spring.  Once I am done I am literally running off campus and never coming back!  Only 9 weeks left until sweet salvation.  Now that it is Spring though, I can finally try to ween myself off my winter sweater-jeans-boots combo.  Slowly but surely! It's not quite warm enough to wear dresses alone and this t-shirt dress looks a bit awkward on me worn by itself so I decided to layer it with a cropped sweater to amp up the warmth and give my outfit a little more proportion.  I haven't been feeling inspired with my outfit choices lately so hopefully that will change now that the weather is getting a little better! 

Dress:  H&M// Sweater: H&M// Boots: DSW London Rebel Trent Bootie

I managed to snag these boots for $15.99 in store!  Not that I need anymore boots but I couldn't say no to that price!  It was sunny earlier this week but has reverted to being chilly and rainy today!  Oh well, even the earth needs some TLC every now and then!  Talking about tender love and care I have been carefully conditioning and treating my hair well in hopes that it will grow even longer than what it already is right now!  I am aiming to have my hair mid-back by next year!  

"Difficult"

For Women Who Are "Difficult" To Love by Warsan Shire

 You are a horse running alone

and he tries to tame you

compares you to an impossible highway

to a burning house

says you are blinding him

that he could never leave you

forget you

want anything but you

you dizzy him, you are unbearable

every woman before or after you

is doused in your name

you fill his mouth

his teeth ache with memory of taste

his body just a long shadow seeking yours

but you are always too intense

frightening in the way you want him

unashamed and sacrificial 

he tells you that no man can live up to the one who 

lives in your head

and you tried to change didn't you?

closed your mouth more

tried to be softer

prettier

less volatile, less awake

but even when sleeping you could feel 

him travelling away from you in his dreams

so what did you want to do love

split his head open?

you can’t make homes out of human beings

someone should have already told you that

and if he wants to leave

then let him leave

you are terrifying

and strange and beautiful

something not everyone knows how to love.